One Woman's Story of Living In Our "New Normal"

   Over the past several days, I have been unpleasantly aware of the effects our ideological divide is having on us emotionally and socially. Common sense has seemed to go out the window in favor of "personal freedom", and anyone who pushes in favor of common sense is publicly humiliated by their peers. People you consider family saying horrible things to you, making downright threats, and peddling ridiculous accusations. Watching your friends slowly becoming more radicalized on Facebook. Seeing people you've cherished for years consider people like you "the enemy".  I feel truly disheartened by this, and it has MASSIVELY affected both my emotional well being, and my social circle.

   With all of the Covid-19 coverage, Trump and his daily drama, the economic collapse for working folk, and the upcoming election, the impact all of this has on us psychologically seems to get left on the wayside. I can only speak of my personal experiences of course, but the never ending anxiety alone has changed me in many ways. The social impact just this past week has had on me, makes me question a good deal of my life. Emotionally, I am drained, heartbroken, disappointed, feel betrayed by people I love, and am totally grossed out by the behavior of some of my peers. I know that this is completely unsustainable for me, I find myself crying over the sense of loss I'm feeling, the humiliation I feel, the disgust. I find it so hard to wrap my head around almost all of it. I try to distract myself with with the joy that is left, my goddaughter and her babies, the awesome friends I do have, the guy I'm crazy about, but it is always there in the back of my mind. It's like I'm living in fucking Bizarro World.

   I'd like to see any scientific reports made about the psychological impact these times are having on people like me. I am sure that I'm not alone in my feelings, or the toll everything is having on my life and thinking. A few weeks ago, I witnessed a close friend get emotional over how friends of over 40 years post how they want to kill people like him on Facebook. It totally broke my heart. What kind of long term impact will things like this have on us as a society? What kind of psychological devastation will it impose on us? These are things that are potentially more pernicious than Covid-19 further on down the road.

   The only thing we can do as members of the resistance is to do what will keep us safe, try not to let the bastards get us down, and stay strong in our principles. People can bully me all they want, but they will NEVER silence me. I may be crying here and there, but that pain will eventually lead to PASSION. If we come together in that mantra, there is nothing that can stop us.

I may only have one match, but I can make an explosion...